A Father’s Role by Randy Rowley 6/12/13 ©
ByAs most boys grow up, they long for the approval and blessing of their fathers. The approval of my father mainly came second-hand. He didn’t praise me to my face often; instead, he would sing my praises to others.
When I killed my first deer, an average-sized doe, at age 16 on a ranch near Lampasas with a borrowed bolt-action .243, there was nothing special about her. But the way my dad bragged about what I’d done to anyone who would listen, you would’ve thought I’d shot a 12-point buck! My dad wasn’t a hunter, but he took me hunting from when I first expressed interest at age 15 until around age 17. Although we were rarely successful and didn’t know much about deer, dove, or duck hunting, I fondly remember those hunts.
But, despite all the second-hand praise, I still longed to hear my father say, “You did well!” Dad didn’t say such words very often, so I loved hearing them when he did. When he said those words to me, I knew he was proud of me for my actions.
Mark 1:9-11 says, “At that time Jesus came from Nazareth in Galilee and was baptized by John in the Jordan. Just as Jesus was coming up out of the water, he saw heaven being torn open and the Spirit descending on him like a dove. And a voice came from heaven: “You are my Son, whom I love; with you I am well pleased.'”
God literally tore heaven open to tell the world Jesus is his son, and he approved of him. As Jesus was 100% man and 100% God, I’m sure his father’s words of approval were just as important to him as our fathers’ words of praise were and are to us, and our words of approval are to our children.
Genesis Chapter 27 tells the story of Isaac mistakenly blessing his son Jacob instead of Jacob’s older brother Esau. Genesis 27:27b-29 says, “When Isaac caught the smell of his clothes, he blessed him and said, “Ah, the smell of my son is like the smell of a field that the Lord has blessed. May God give you heaven’s dew and earth’s richness — an abundance of grain and new wine. May nations serve you and peoples bow down to you. Be lord over your brothers, and may the sons of your mother bow down to you. May those who curse you be cursed and those who bless you be blessed.’”
Fathers have a unique role in parenting their children. Just as Isaac was responsible for blessing his firstborn son, fathers should affirm their children. You must let your children know at a minimum:
- You love, are proud of, and approve of them.
- Before they were conceived, God knew them and set them apart. Jeremiah 1:5 says, “‘Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, before you were born I set you apart; I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.'”
- God has plans for their prosperity, hope, and future and not to harm them. Jeremiah 29:11 says, “‘For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.'”
- They are strong, but real strength comes through Christ. Philippians 4:13 says, “I can do all this through him who gives me strength.”
- Jesus is the only way to eternal life. John 14:6b says, “Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.'”
- In Christ, they have been brought near to God, he is their peace, they are no longer strangers – but citizens, and they are sealed for the day of redemption (see Ephesians chapter 2 and 4:30).
- Because they are children of the King, they have what it takes to succeed in whatever God calls them to do. But true success only comes from following and obeying God. Joshua 1:8 says, “Keep this Book of the Law always on your lips; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful.”
God placed a huge responsibility on fathers to love, affirm, encourage, and bless our children. Showing our children we love and are proud of them is admirable, but we mustn’t forget to tell them. They desperately need to hear it. They long for our praise more than we’ll ever know.
When your child makes a good shot at the range, harvests a game animal or bird, or catches a fish, make a big deal of it, even if that shot, animal, or fish doesn’t meet your standards. Tell your family, friends, and neighbors you’re proud of your kid. But, more importantly, tell your child!